Sunday, 29 March 2009

Its not normal

Well here goes........

I was on the bus the other week coming back from a job interview.... another one.... will go back to that later and unfortunately I had to go and sit on the upper level at the back. Casting my mind back to school this was the place where people used to smoke and generally get up to untold naughties.
I thought to myself no this wont be the case this time as this is real life and not a school bus, obviously the rules must be different. But no obviously some people never grow up never shed those habits of old.
I suddenly realised that the people around me could have represented cast members from the show Shameless. I went through all the people on the bus and could link them in with at least one of the cast. Surreal as this sounded I was facinated, waiting to see what one of them did next.
All was quiet then one of the lads sitting in front of me whom I am going to link to micky, pulled out a massive sandwich bag of skunk and proceeded to roll a joint on the bus. I could not believe my eyes, my previous 10 minute thought process just proved correct, I was in face travelling with the chatsworth regulars!!!!
I left the bus in the city centre hope to reaquaint myslef with some elment of normality when I was faced with possibly one of the most non normal things that I have ever seen, I cast my eyes over towards a coffee shop debating whether a shot of caffeine would indeed help to dial down the crazy or not when I saw a man, on first glance this was fine, he was mid thirties wearing a nice red polo t shirt and khaki shorts and nice shoes and white socks. He neither looks odd, scary or deformed in any way, just ya regular joe going about his business. However on second inspection it was not what this man was doing it was more what he was carrying. He was walking through the busiest street no where near any surgery or faciulity where the item he was carrying could be of any use. He was in fact carrying a full hip to toe artifical leg complete with sock and trainer!!!!!

I look for a minute not believing my eyes, instantly I cast my eyes down to his legs, and indeed he did have infact two normal fleshy legs. I was do dumfounded that I just stopped and stared. I mean this is something that you expect to see in a hospital, or any form of medical establishment or one of those disability shops, not stood outside the O2 shop!!

I decided that the only option available to me was to go home and scream into a pillow instantly. So after going to Marks and Spencer to get my lunch thats exacly what I did. I have often pondered what the man was doing with the leg!! Where was he taking it? Did the person who it belonged to know he had it? and if not what type of person would steal peg leg? You are slowly now seeing the reason why I have had to come back to writing this.

Last year I lived in the country the crazy was there but hidden by a tree or something now its everywhere all around me, now I am lost in the big city!

Back again so soon

Well here goes almost a year on from my last post I am back. Bet the world had just let out a massive sign of relief!! However no your not safe he is back with even more ammo now to rant on about to amuse you the masses.

Over the past year I have decided there are alot of thing in this world that are just not normal!!!
Odd things that I see almost out of the corner of my my eye that occur around me at any point within the day wherever I seem to be. I am going to update these very odd occurances in this blog to hopefully prove that either I am insane or there are odd things occuring almost like a spectre we can only sometimes see !!!

Well going back to some element of normal for a moment in the past year lots of things have occured generally in my life. I have changed careers, geographical localtion, changed again job titles and been out of the country!! And all of this I have managed to do in 8 months and not get a single grey hair....... Ok 2 but they were plucked from my scalp and sacrificially burned never to return.

I now live with Andrew my long suffereng boyfriend who now endures my daily databurts of all the weird and wonderful things that happen to me everyday. I think for his own mental health he should invest in earoplugs.
I now have the best commute to work in the world it take the grand old time of 15 mins to totter down the road and I am sat at my desk. I started one job and now got another 7 months later I am slowly taking over the world!!! Shhhhhh dont tell anyone.
On the whole things are going great at the minute.